How Blogs Are Bringing Black Women Together

October 19, 2011

By Katrice 

I say all the time that I become more of myself every day because of My Vicarious Life. I don't know that I've come to a more refreshing realization in all my life. 

I started this blog with a solid group of women around me cheering me on. I was excited about it but I knew it would be taking me out of my comfort zone of working the background. I'd write a post and scrutinize over the spacing, the word choice and more than anything else -- the photos. I wanted my obsession with excellence to be evident in even the simplest entry. My first several followers were friends and I was so happy to have them. And then, I met Fajr Muhammad of via Twitter. She mentioned one of my blog posts and I was completely taken aback. I visited her blog and was doubly amazed. She had nothing to gain from chatting with me and expressing any interest in my humble lifestyle blog. {Sidebar: Her blog was ah-mazing.} 

That was the beginning. 

Fajr was only the first of what has grown into a sisterhood of Black women bloggers -- many of whom I have never met in person, but -- who encourage me to keep on keeping on. Maybe we stumble upon each other's sites or find one another through mutual acquaintances. But, what's so unique about these meetings is that a network has formed organically, and that we have little to gain from each other except sharing and receiving. 

I use the word unique just to signify our virtual interactions. However, what is so profound about these budding relationships is that they are reflective of black women's kinship on the whole but a kind of relating that we have gotten away from for so many reasons.

Sometimes, a woman needs to be affirmed by those who reflect her image to recognize her value. I don't know a more empowering affirmation.

These women -- Fajr, EbonyJanice, Margaret of Fierce and Beauty Fashion and Timeisha of Urban Glam Gyrl -- are sisters in my head. And they are symbolic of so many who understand that we are not in competition but that we are, in fact, each other's testimony. 

I am often reminded of the scene in "Beloved" when Sethe {Oprah Winfrey's character} is called from her house by praying women in the front of her property who have come to her rescue. Dramatic ... but a showing that has always been, in my mind, the essence of who we are.

When I started My Vicarious Life, I was sure that it was simply an outlet for me to share my adventures in being more social. But, that -- thank goodness -- was just my launching point. MVL has actually been the place where I found myself through my sisterfriends. You have  pushed me into a complete and unapologetic expression of myself and acceptance of my voice. 

I wish I could thank every single one of you. But, just know that if you're reading this post ... this message is for you.

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  1. I am sitting here reading this with tears in my eyes. It has truly been a pleasure e-meeting you and becoming fast friends. Your blog is one I look to because your spirit radiates through each post, your joy and love of life is so apparent.

    I love that you write that we have nothing to gain from one another aside from genuine support and mutual kinship. MJ of Fierce is another sister in my head. I truly wouldn't blog if it weren't for the amazing support that you ladies have showed me. It has been a honor to support and laugh with you. One day we will do it in person :)

  2. Great message and beautifully written!

  3. i so want to give you a hug right now!!! i am truly touched by your post and completely share you sentiments. i have "met" some of the most wonderful people through my blog, twitter & facebook... people like you what have inspired & motivated me from afar to pursue my passions and who have supported me in ways that they don't know. i do feel a kindred spirit with you Katrina, and although we have yet to physically meet i feel that you have been placed in my life for a reason. Like Fajr said your blog radiates your spirit through each post, it would be selfish of me not to want to share that with others! xoxo :-)

  4. AWESOME POST! and so true many bloggers are sister friends in my head

  5. Oh my goodness, I am really trying to find the words to express how incredibly humbled I am to be included woth these wonderful women. It's crazy how we connected just sharing a common passion for what we love and for life period. To be able to have such positive and energetic spirit through words just in a Twitter message is a wonderful gift that you have! I'm honored to be one of your sisters and we have to make it a point to meet each other in person!

    I'm all warm and fuzzy inside!! Thank you so much!

  6. Awesome post! Although my blog is about desserts, I secretly think I am a fashionista or at least an aspiring one so I LOVE reading your blog! I'm a purse girl too and a natural hair diva. Wow, we have so much in common.
    :-) I love seeing us support each other and dispelling the myth that we as black women don't get along or support each other because we do.

    Thanks for sharing and I can't wait to attend one of your "live" events. :-)


  7. I have no idea how I even found this blog post - maybe a link on Twitter; but I HAD to comment.

    I too have been so amazed by the online connections that I have made with others. A recent conversation with at Twitter friend proved to me that these connections not only surpass the online world, they are true friendships. When I called my 'Twitter' friend, I could instantly tell (by the tone of her voice) that she wasn't in the best of moods; and although I didn't know her that well I voiced my concern. 30 minutes of venting, counseling, and laughter later... I realized that my new BFF was not a shallow online connection - she was much more. As a multi-ethnic woman of color that has faced discrimination from peers, colleagues, and even family - I willingly join the ranks of online-relationship-building advocates!

  8. Beautiful post! When I started blogging I never thought I would meet and be inspired by so many amazing women! So happy to have met you.

  9. Loooove this. Just yesterday I went thrifting and out to lunch with two ladies I met through blogging. I consider my Tweeps and blog buddies friends and genuinely would help them out in any way that I can. This is truly an awesome avenue through which black women are rebuilding our sisterhoods and creating bonds that are likely to last a lifetime. We all need one anothers words of encouragement and cheers along the way. Well written post!

  10. I just got chills. I feel this everyday & I feel so empowered knowing that we can look at each other, just as you said, like "we are not in competition but that we are, in fact, each other's testimony." Such an amazing post & although I haven't been a follower of your blog for long, I feel a connection and common ground already!


  11. I enjoyed this post. It is so NECESSARY for us to be united as black women and I am thrilled that we all can connect thru the power of the "word". Thanks for spreading your adventures and building connections thru your modeling. U R THE BEST!
    S Nicole

  12. Awesome post Katrice! I've only known you a few months and I think I can attest that you are truly genuine and an inspiration to others like myself. We are natural sisters at heart. In my past time, I would like to think that I am a curvy fashionista as well. But I don't have the courage to start a fashion or lifestyle blog. Until then, I will continue to get my inspiration thru you and live Vicariously thru you! :)

  13. Amazing post and I truly feel that you are an amazing friend. I am thankful that blogs are bring more women of color together various allowing the world to rip us apart. Keep doing what you are doing you are destine for greatness. Proud to have you as a mentor =)

  14. WOW!!!!!!! GREAT POST HONEY. I am truly thankful for my pretty blogger friends. I never knew starting this venture that God would guide my path to such cool and inspiring people. Keep it up :)

  15. what a wonderful post! Sorry im late commenting! i truly agree with everything that you stated! I hope you don't mind me sharing!

  16. This was truly uplifting and I am so encouraged that there are other women of color banning together and lifting each other up, supporting one another. I want to thank you Katrice for being the first person to leave a comment on my blog, I'm just starting so to speak and just seeing your comment really made a difference for me.

  17. Katrice, I just found this post and it literally gave me chills! You are such a positive inspiration to us! I am super grateful to all of the bloggers I've met in person and via social media since I started this venture. I look forward to continuing to build positive new relationships...


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